I'm feeling sorta sick at the moment.

I was outside a bit ago, pruning some trees near my mailbox with my 5yo son and 10yo stepson. Both were behind me in the driveway, but on the edge of the street. As the last branch parted ways with the tree and came falling to the road, I heard a V8 winding up, and it was heading toward me. I looked up the road and a Crown Vic was bearing down on us.

Simultaneously as I looked up, my 10yo pulled his little brother out of the street, and the cabbie noticed us. He came off the accelerator but was still going at least double the posted 15mph. We have narrow streets and kids beside mine on the street. Both the speed limit and warnings for kids are posted within 30' of the intersection with my street and the main drag through town.

I see red when people go tearing through my neighborhood anyway, but today was different. My kids were outside, and in danger. The cabbie slowed and stopped in front of me. I started yelling (CJSA says the whole neighborhood probably heard me - I yell pretty loud), and I said some pretty unpleasant things that included a couple 4-letter words. He opened his window and tried to say something in response. Instead of thinking of the kids and backing off, I stepped toward the car and leveled my saw at his face, and told him in no uncertain terms that he should shut his g-d window, leave and never come back.

Thankfully, he did.

But I'm pretty conflicted about the whole thing, right now. I showed my kids getting angry and threatening someone was OK. And I think most of me thinks that I did the right thing, and I'd do it again if I had to. But another part of me is feeling a bit scared that my kids might not fully understand why I said and did what I did.

Was/am I wrong?



FOCUS: Have you been in a situation like this? If so, what happened and what was the resolution?

Right or wrong, you showed true human emotion. I think what's more important at this point is how your kid's perceive you feel about blowing up at the guy. If they perceive an attitude of "Guess I showed him!" they'll learn to believe that it is an appropriate response. If they perceive an attitude of "I'm sorry I reacted so angrily but I was worried about your safety" maybe they'll understand that while such reactions aren't appropriate, everyone including Dad is human and slips now and then.

Yeah, I agree.

Normal reaction to an abnormal (very serious) situation.

Sit down and have a talk with them. Explain how emotions can affect folks, and make sure that they get the right message from it.

Your incident was at the high end of emotions. Explain that in terms that they will understand. It'll be fine.

Maybe they'll be bragging to their buddies at school about what you did and how cool you are! LOL

Sounds like you have done great with them so far, so they'll take what you say to heart.

Good luck!

Your kids just got a good look at the realities of life. I doubt they are scarred from it. One of your kids had the wisdom and courage to pull his sibling out of harms way. Kudos for him.

Call the cab company and give the day and time of the incident. They need to know how their drivers are performing. Chances are he has other hits on his record.

I cannot really add anything to how HotByte advises you.

I agree. Kids are alot smarter than we think. I applaud you for realizing that your actions need a explanation to your children.

John Dryden: " Beware the fury of a patient man "

Chances are this has really bother you a lot more than you thought and today was just the right combination of circumstances that made you unable to restrain yourself in your usual manner.

I live on a double bind S-curve leading to a cul-del-sac.I found my self is a very similar situtation a few years ago with a guy delivering pizza in my developement. After ripping up the street to delivery the pizza, I waited for him to head back and purposly walked right in front of his truck and stopped him. I opened his door, and proceeded tp ripped him a new one to the point I think he needed a new set of boxers.
I then took down the plate #, called the Pizza Shop - ripped the owner a new one, and then called the police department and filed a complaint.

Other than the 4 letter words, in reality it is good that your the children see some one take the proper position. The is no gray zone in the driver's actions - cleary dangerous and illegal. What the children saw was a sence of moral outrage and will intill a respect for what is proper and what should to be tolerated.

That said, I would also take the time to explain to them how upset you were that there was a threat to their safety and that to an extent you were not " yourself ".

All in all, better that they learn about these things from a loving father than anywhere else.

Take it easy

Scott

I second the sentiments on calling the cab company. They do need to know how their drivers are driving. It sounds like a dangerous area to be going above the speed limit.
I probably would have acted the same way. Don't be too worried about the kids. Kids are smart. They will figure out after you talk to them that #1 Dad is human and protective of his brood.
#2 That they need to keep an eye on the street for cars (sounds like they've got this one down-I would just reinforce it)
#3 They will learn that there is a time and place for "outbursts" and that we can control them (which it sounds like you did a good job of)
#4 The monst important thing they will walk away with is: Dad love us!!

It takes a loving parent to sit down and explain these types of things to the kids. You'd be not so great if you didn't....

Take it easy on yourself.

LBS

I think you did just fine. I know when my mild-mannered dad had an outburst on an evil-doer, I as a young lad was proud!

A couple of weeks ago, I was at the shop getting ready to leave when I saw a young girl drop a bunch of garbage out the window. My 12 YO son was with me, and we left in the same direction that she was heading. She unfortunetely got caught in traffic trying to make a left turn onto a dead-end street. I was not trying to catch her, but I WAS fuming because I am constantly picking up all sorts of crap from my property that people throw out the window. As I signaled to turn left, I calmly told my son that this is something that you should NOT do. I will spare the details of the conversation, but let's just say when I got back to the shop, the trash was picked up.

CJS - Glad all are okay.....good advice already given.....

A couple of days ago a guy and his wife were riding their Harleys. The guy had their 10 year old son on back with him. Some lady in front of them threw a cigarette butt out the window. The guy decides to have a word with her--while driving. He pulls along side her and confronts her. She speeds up to get away from him, he speeds up. *Per reports* they eventually collided. *Per speculation* she ran him off the road.

The results: Mom seen the whole thing happen; dad and the kid went crashing to the ground. The dad gave the kid his helmet to wear. The kid got banged up, but dad is in critical condition with severe head injuries. This has been very controversial in the blogs...

These two situations are similar, 2 dads upset about what another driver was doing, and children were involved. But one dad disregarded his child's safety to get his point across, and may have killed himself in the process...

The other dad made sure his kids were safe first.

You did just fine. As everyone else has said, kids ain't dumb. And if nothing else, they'll forever know that speeding thru neighborhoods isn't cool. They may never speed thru neighborhoods themselves just because of this experience. And that's a good thing.

I don't feel the same as most of you. Waving a saw and yelling at the cab driver amounted to nothing. Other than the driver now thinks your crazy? In no way he is now thinking "He sure scared me into a lesson of going slower."

Calling the cab company in my mind would of been allot more fruitful.

I've had a couple of outbursts like you did - never a really proud moment.

Anyway, in this day and age, you've got to be really careful. Guy could have pulled out a 9mm and decked you with it right in front of the kids.

Remind us how many kids you have again? You will never understand the emotion that runs until you have kids. Trust me...I did not.

Yep. I'm acutely aware of this. Even after sleeping on it, I'm still pretty ticked off at myself for this very reason.




I'm acutely aware of this, too. And taxi drivers are known for handling *odd* people from time to time. Part of the job and whatnot. So, uh, yeah. I looked crazy and acted pretty stupidly. Thankfully, the kids and I are still here to talk about it.

Further, I now know that crazy guy lives inside me someplace, and I need to make sure he doesn't stab someone in the face with a pole saw.

My brother worked as a manager of a grocery store in our home town.
While he was out gather carts he saw a lady change her baby's diaper and toss the dirty one to the ground. She then went into the store to shop.

Brother walked over to the car, picked the diaper up and placed it under the drivers seat.

Oklahoma, August, 105 temp, car with the windows rolled up. You get the idea.